Dulce delicous.

During Christmas we all make and eat things that we shouldn't. Dulce de leche is one of these things. I found out just how good this stuff is when a friend of mine married a man from Chile. This man's mother is a renowned baker in her area, and they make a cake from thin cookies and dulce de leche.

My friend actually brought some home with her. The cake was covered in powdered sugar and wrapped in saran wrap. It was a towering firm thing, well adhered and sturdy. I looked around the interwebs and found that there are a few people out there who have had this, and mostly they talk about it. Many people who have had that cake do not also speak English.

I found a partial recipe, but found that the cookie dough was a pain in the butt to deal with and hard to roll out. I also have found that I have one small oven and only two racks. To make this cake you need around seven layers of cookie in the middle.

I have come up with my own invention. It is not the recipe that my friend's mom makes. Hers has hard cookies in it, and I don't really have the recipe for that. I have come up with a solution. It includes a pie dough type layering item and dulce de leche. It works well and is well received. It is messy and not very pretty, so I always like to dust it well with powdered sugar and well trim the sides. I think the cake that my friend's mom makes is round, mine is square. Not to fear, it is good, and people will think you amazing for making it. So with a simpler version of a dessert I cannot recreate I give you:

Dulce De Leche Cake

Oh, you might have to make multiples of the dough recipe. Just make the cake until you run out of dulce de leche.

Ingredients:

2 C. high quality unbleached flour
4 oz. cream cheese
3 oz. butter
2 Tbs. natural sugar

2-3 cans of sweetened condensed milk

Powdered sugar

Method:

I do not recommend you do this, I have told you this before, not a good idea. Peel the cans of condensed milk (or you can purchase cans of dulce de leche in the Mexican isle at some grocery stores). I might mention, I do it all the time, nothing explodes, I also use a pot I don't care about. Place them in the bottom of a large pot. Fill the pot with water 3 inches over the tops of the cans. Cover with a tight lid and boil for 8 hours. Do not let the water level drop below 1 inch over the cans. Remove from water and cool completely.

In a food processor combine the flour, sugar, cream cheese and butter. Pulse until it looks like grit. Add one or two tablespoons of water to get the dough to barely come together. If your dough is too wet you will have to use a lot of dusting flour.

Divide dough into thirds. Roll the dough out very thin, place it on a cookie sheet and poke all over with a fork. Bake 350 for about 10-15 minutes or until the edges get brown. Remove from cookie sheet, repeat.

Now with your skills cut your dough in half and make the best shaped half the size/shape of your cake. Place this on a plate and spread with dulce de leche. Place the other half on top, or use pieces and create a jigsaw type layer. Cover with dulce de leche. I usually go about 6-8 layers. Cut the sides on the cake to make a nice presentation and make sure the top is covered in a generous layer of dulce de leche. To keep the cake fresh cover it in powdered sugar (sides and all) and wrap tightly in saran wrap. To serve the cake place on a little plate and re-cut the sides if they are looking messy. Sprinkle with powdered sugar.

A little cake made like this (about 3x3 or 4x4 inches) will be enough for a 10-15 person party. It is very rich and you only need a little tiny square of it. I said it was good, not good for you.

Mmmm Pie.

I do not like pie. I have nothing against pie, but in the struggles of day to day life, if someone asks 'would you like some pie?' I would probably say no thank you.

Pie is a dessert that I can defiantly say no to. There is good pie, better pie, and bad pie. Most pie is in the latter two categories, and if I were to eat pie, it would have to be good pie. I also prefer cream pies, or just pie filling to actual pie. In the world of pie, there are things that say they are pie and aren't pie. We normally call these cream pies. They aren't really pie, it's pudding in a shell. We go to a restaurant and they have this thing they call peanut butter pie. It isn't pie, it's a creamy dessert in a shell, it should probably be severed in little cups, it doesn't need a crust. I've seen the health cook books talk about crust-less pie, there really isn't such a thing, now you just have custard. Or fruit, I like fruit.

I guess what I don't like about pie is the crust. I like pumpkin pie filling, that's ok, not enough to actually make it as a dessert, but it's not bad. However the crust is not my thing, I just don't like it. I feel like this about most pie fillings, starting with blueberry being my fav, and going down from there.

So in the efforts to make a non pie, pie, I have come up with what could probably be termed peanut butter bars. I call it peanut butter pie, only because I made it in a pie pan. I got the idea from Dilettante. This is a good confectioner that has some shops in the area. They make some things well that I cannot do. They also make peanut butter bars that are a huge disappointment. I get one every time I go too, and the crushing disappointment gets me every time. The main reason they're not any good is because they are made of crust. The crust is twice as thick as the filling, flavorless and dry. Horrible way to ruin a good idea. Anyhow I've been working on it and the secret is sweetened condensed milk. And thin crust. You have to have thin crust.

I have never measured this with cups or silly things like that, so you might need to adjust a bit.

Note: it is Christmas time, and there is nothing healthy about it.

Peanut Butter Pie

Ingredients:

7 oz. peanut butter
1 can sweetened condensed milk
1 C. semi sweet chocolate chips
1/2 C. butter
2 C. flour
4 oz. cream cheese
4 oz. butter
1/4 C. sugar

Method:

Butter a springform pan. Cut the cream cheese and butter into the flour and sugar. Add a touch of water and press enough of the dough into the bottom of the pan to cover it, you may have leftover dough.

Bake the crust at 350 for about 10-15 minutes. Mix the condensed milk and peanut butter together. Spread onto the crust and bake at 350 for about thirty minutes. When the peanut butter is slightly more brown on the edges it is done. Remove and set to cool. While the pie is cooling heat the chocolate chips and butter together over low heat until melted, pour over the pie and allow to cool completely. Cut into wedges and serve.

Pumpkin on the go!

Just before this past Halloween I stole a party from a friend and invited people over for pumpkin treats and pumpkin carving. It was a byop party, so I only provided pumpkins for my husband and myself. I ended up with about seven pumpkins on my porch.

In an attempt to create a themed party I thought long and hard about the various things you can do with pumpkin. I scoured the interwebs and looked through cookbooks. I finally came up with a plan: caramel corn - while not pumpkiny, it is a fall classic; pumpkin cupcakes, pumpkin curry empanandas, and a pumpkin pie martini.

The day started out well, it was pleasant enough outside, and I cleaned and cooked while my husband worked on various things. It was when I was making the caramel corn that the weather changed, and I realized I had made a tragic mistake. As I was stirring the corn I noticed that it wasn't very crisp, and wasn't getting any better. I thought that perhaps I hadn't cooked the caramel long enough, so I turned the oven up, just a bit and cooked it a little longer.

It was when I was giving up that I realized it was raining outside and told myself how stupid I am. You may not be aware, and my husband thinks it's silly, but you can't make candy in the rain. I don't know exactly why, but I have a theory. If you have ever bought brown sugar, which comes in the stupidest packages, you will notice that in a few weeks it's a hard little brick. The reason powdered sugar contains corn starch is to keep the sugar from absorbing water from the air. Sugar pulls moisture in from the air. Normally you keep your sugar in an airtight container, When it rains outside, the air is fully saturated with water. It's very humid. If you don't believe me that's fine, but you should try making candy in the rain and deal with the resulting mess. The best days to make candy are cold dry winter days.

At this point you might be wondering what I did with my grainy caramel corn. I served it anyhow. It tasted good, but wasn't as crisp as I would like, but I followed Julia Child's directions, and pretended like I meant for that to happen. Caramel clusters! yeah, that's it!

If you're going to make caramel corn I have one piece of advice for you. Use butter. Don't use margarine at all. Butter. Don't try to fancy it up, it's really good all on it's own.

The pumpkin empanandas were delicious, being that I cooked up a bunch of leeks in butter added canned pumpkin, buttermilk and garham masala. I also was a big cheater pants and used canned biscuits instead of making my own dough. I had enough to do without that.

My big success was the pumpkin martini. Let's talk for a minute about the so called 'pumpkin spice' crap that you see all over the place. Starbucks does it, you can buy liquor that is pumpkin spice, or candy, anyhow these things aren't pumpkin anything. They have a commonly used spice blend in them. Pumpkin pie spice is used in all kinds of things, it should just be called sweet mixed spices. I use it in zucchini bread, carrot cake, pancakes, green tomato cake, etc. etc. The word pumpkin is confusing, there's no pumpkin, or pumpkin flavor, in your pumpkin spice latte.


Anyhow when I looked on the interwebs for directions on how to make a pumpkin pie martini, I got a couple of suggestions: make pumpkin pie spice liquor, use Goldschlager, and the worst one yet: take canned pumpkin pie filling, mix it into your vodka and strain. Gross. I can't even imagine the nast that you would have to serve in a clear glass if that's what you did!

I went my own road and flew into a rage of cocktail making frenzy. I know, and some of you might, that canned pumpkin is not actually made from the pumpkin that pops into your brain when you hear the word. It's a similar gourd, but not the same. It's actually closer in taste to a butternut squash than to the pumpkins we see in the store. The reason for this is pumpkins in the store are grown for looks, and not taste. I even have my doubts about the flavor of sugar pumpkins. I think the canned pumpkin tastes much stronger than that from a 'pumpkin'.

Keeping this in mind I bought a butternut squash and went about the business of making my own cocktail. You will have to mix and taste to find the perfect combination, just as I did.

I am currently trying another batch made with sugar pumpkin, only because I'm wondering if I can up the pumpkin factor. Also I couldn't find a butternut squash at the store (weird I know). I don't think the color will be as good, and I think the flavor will be milder. The pumpkin has a lot more water in it than the butternut squash, so it didn't roast up so dry, and I think that was one of the reasons I got a good concentrated flavor, no added water.

It is important that you cook your chosen squash or gourd. The reason is, that you get that great cooked pumpkin taste when you roast the pumpkin. Fresh pumpkin, and gourds, have a distinct smell and taste. The reason pumpkin pie filling is so good on it's own is because it's cooked (come on, you know you always grab a spoonful.)

Pumpkin Pie Martini

Ingredients:

3 quarts of decent quality vodka (a big bottle)
1 butternut squash
1 whole nutmeg, cut up
7-9 allspice berries
1 pinch cardamom seed
9 whole cloves
1 cinnamon stick or cinnamon oil
3 clean quart jars and lids
2 C. organic sugar
1 C. water
Baily's Irish Cream

Method:

Place all the spices into one jar and cover with 3-4 cups of vodka. Close lid and shake. Cut up the butternut squash, don't worry about peeling it. Remove all the seeds and roast at 450 for about 20-30 minutes or until the squash is tender and bit dry on the outside. Cut up the squash a bit and put into two jars. Cover with vodka. Place all your sealed jars into a dark place and shake them every day for two weeks. Strain and put into new jars. Let these sit for one week in a dark place. In a pan place the sugar and water and bring to a boil. Cool completely. Now comes the good part, using a tablespoon mix together varying amounts of the two vodkas, sweetener and Baily's until you get something that tastes like a pie. At this point write down how much of it you used. I would recommend that you put no more than one part vodka and one part Baily's together, as the Baily's will curdle if you use more vodka than Baily's. My proportions were: 1 part squash vodka, 1/3 part spice vodka, 1/3 sweetener. This I mixed and called the base mix. I then mixed a shot of this with a shot of Baily's. Garnish with nutmeg.

Note: I used cinnamon oil at the end to adjust the spice mixture, to ensure that it had enough of that ... cinnamon flavor infused.